First Impressions

We know first impressions count, has there been a time in your life where you think “wish I could turn back time and make that first impression again” because you made one that didn’t show you in your best light. Maybe you where a little stressed at the time and acted a little more out of character than normal, perhaps a little forthright, more demanding, a little quieter, confrontational, jovial.

There are lots of reasons why we do, say and react the way we do and it can often be other people’s behaviours that influence this, the environment that we find ourselves in.

Here’s a little story of the first impression I made:

Imagine this….

You’ve been away travelling for 4 weeks, you’ve landed back in the UK after a long night flight, on minimal sleep and a little jet lagged you arrive at your works conference, there is a new CEO and you haven’t yet met them but there is a real buzz around that they are going to make a huge impact to the business.

You arrive, and are in need of a very strong coffee, you see some team colleagues and say hello, everyone asks about the trip, there really is a great atmosphere. Douwe Egbert’s are sponsoring the conference, GREAT, because a strong coffee will help hit the endorphins. You turn to the smart-looking Barrista, in a very neat red shirt, who turns to ask how you are and can he help…

Me “Yes please mate, strong coffee”

Him “Oh big day? Hungover?”

Me “No, new CEO and I’ve just arrived back from 4 weeks travel and I’m all over the place and need to make a good impression, I want to make Sales Director this year”

Him “ Really, perhaps a larger than normal espresso then – a sugar shot too I would suggest”

Me “Amazing – thank you – dude you’re a lifesaver, right let’s find a seat”

I take my coffee and WOW packs a punch, turn to my colleagues and say ‘right let’s find a seat, want to get a good view of this new CEO”

In unison they look at me and say “Oh you will”

Queue big music,

Queue big announcement

Queue big entrance

“Ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the stage, David Ford” I spit my coffee out, my face drops, the new CEO has walked on stage, fabulous suit and a crisp RED SHIRT, yup, you go it, he was mingling in the crowd (no jacket) and I asked him for a coffee!!! By the way, all the Douwe Egberts barristers where in smart black trousers and crisp red shirts.

I looked at my colleagues, who where now all creased in giggles, I just mouthed “why did you let me do that?”

That’s was 2002, I worked for Regus and David Ford had just been announced as the new CEO when Alchemy bought a 58% stakehold.

Move 22 years later to now, 2024, and I am still in touch with David Ford, we have been all the way through my career , and yes I made Sales Director whilst I worked for him, and he has been one of the mentors and role models throughout my life ever since. We often joke about that first meeting and the impression I made, he even added it to his keynote speech, when I invited him to speak at a conference I was organising.

When I asked David what it was about me, my first impression, he said “Here’s a person no lacking in confidence”

Now, this could have been a sliding doors moment because as I was so jaded, my opening line was above, when David asked if he could help. Knowing my personality, it could so have easily been something like

“Oh yes please, I’m just back from an amazing 4 weeks travelling around New Zealand and Australia, I’m in the middle of a divorce from my narcissistic husband, selling the family home, currently living in a friend’s spare bedroom and to top it all I’ve now found out I’ve got a new CEO who is supposed to be a real tough cookie and been told I had to be back for this conference today, having landed about 3 hours ago – give me something and make it strong!”

I think the fact that I was so “in a spin” that the above did not come out of my mouth. Would it have changed the relationship with David, probably not in the long term, but it would have made the first impression very different. You see back in 2002, I really had no self-awareness of my behaviour, the impact I had on others. I was (and still am to be fair) very extroverted, loud, and people-focused, just that now I have filters and self-awareness so when I am with people who are not like me, when I meet people for the first time, I have learnt to flex and adapt and refrain from letting the full me come out. I’m not being disingenuous to who I am, I am respectful to those around me. Not everyone wants a Tigger greeting.

I am writing this as I am on a train to London to meet David for Lunch, to talk about life and work, even now, 22 years later, he is still a mentor and role model, giving me his worldly wisdom to support my journey in business.

What makes a great leader? Someone who believes in you, even when you do not. They celebrate your wins, challenge your falls, but above all they champion you.